In a town where it
rains all the time and the sun is rarely spotted through the clouds, there
lived a little girl. She was approximately 11 years old and was just beginning
the sixth grade. The little girl was plain in appearance but bursting with
imagination, a trait nobody cared to recognize because she was so terribly
plain. She had light brown hair and light brown eyes and went about her life in
the town as unnoticed as the sun. Her parents often forgot about her. She had
no friends, and even teachers couldn’t remember who she was.
This
little girl was not sad, however. She did not need anyone to make her happy
except herself and her closest companion. When she was nine, she had taken in a
baby fox who she saw drowning in it’s burrow with no sign of a mother. Since
they both had spent their lives generally unnoticed, they developed a close
bond. Every day they went for a walk together, and the little girl talked to
the fox about things nobody would listen to otherwise. She discussed things
like politics and philosophy, but dedicated most of the conversation to
creating interesting stories for the fox and planning their lives when they
finally got away from the town.
As
the fox was her only friend, she valued it immensely. One day, an exceptionally
rainy day, it had down poured for six hours and was not slowing down. School
was cancelled due to flooding, so the little girl and the fox laid down for a
nap. When she woke up, the fox was gone from her arms. The rain had not ceased,
but she set out to find her friend anyways. Her parents didn’t notice when she
left the house and nobody paid any attention to the 11 year old girl hopelessly
wandering through the rain. She called to the fox, and finally heard it’s yelp
of return across the street, in a little park surrounded by lush green trees.
She
ran to the noise with dedication and speed, only to trip on a stick and find
herself chin deep in a puddle. Due to the incessant rain, maintenance to the
park was minimal, and it was not unusual to find large holes caused by erosion,
digging dogs, or children making their way to China. This particular hole was
about five feet deep. The little girl was not yet that tall, and as nobody ever
cared to teach her, she never learned to swim. The water was cold and deep and
she struggled to stay afloat.
The
fox ran over to where she tread water, fighting not to drown. She pleaded with
it to get help, but all it could do was cry and try to come closer to her. “Run
for help!” she screamed. But the fox wailed and did not move away, only towards
her. The little girl realized the fox did not want to leave her side, as each was
the only companionship the other had ever had. The fox stepped closer to the
hole until it too was stuck, drowning. The rain fell so hard; it washed away
their cries. They clung to each other, and after about thirty minutes of
fighting, they gave up and sank to the bottom of the hole.
About
a week later, the sun appeared. The floods receded and the earth was dry and
calm. The girl and the fox lay together at the bottom of the hole. It was not
until this day that her parents had noticed her disappearance, followed by
students and teachers.
They
discovered the little girl and the fox at the bottom of the hole in the
abandoned park. As the sun shined in the hole, everyone noticed her plainness.
The fox was plain also. And like the park, nobody had paid either of the two
any mind. Now, people sobbed the loss. But these people meant nothing to the
little girl and the fox. They died together and with their death, left behind a
world that never paid any attention.
I would like to see a bit more character development. Like describe the scene where she meets the fox. And put in a scene where she interacts with her parents and teachers instead of just repeating how no one noticed them. Otherwise, I like that you made one the main characters a fox and the rainy town was a great setting
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